WHO'S KATY PERRY?

I felt like Chris Rock at the Oscars talking about Jude Law when I switched on THE YOUNG AND THE RESTLESS today. Who is Katy Perry and why has she taken over the show? I have never heard of her but from the way Amber and Jana were acting it made it seem like every youth in America was texting each other about Katy Perry while simultaneously looking up her Twitter page and downloading her song from iTunes to their Crackberrys.

Whatev. I've got some Angie and Jesse to watch, which is vastly more compelling. Debbi Morgan and Darnell Williams really sold the scenes of Angie pleading with Jesse not to go back to work on the police force even though we know Jesse has to become a police chief or else there's NO STORY. Still, ALL MY CHILDREN is to be commended for showing Angie's distress.

THE BOLD AND THE BEAUTIFUL is not to be commended, because that shot of Jack Wagner in extreme close-up backed by a heavenly light was WAY too much! I understand that Katie was dying and thought this was the afterlife(!) but REALLY! As with the fake flashback to Katie's Dogfight Acne Prom, I get the feeling the B&B team are pissing themselves off-camera. Stop this, guys -- this is how PASSIONS ended up being nothing but a collection of piss-takes and got CANCELLED. I will say I did like the business meeting scene because it is fun to see the Forrester family all together, working hard to bring down Donna. I was flipping back and forth between this and AMC, so I might have missed something, but shouldn't Pam have been in that scene, snarking away as she served coffee?

Just when I thought ONE LIFE TO LIVE couldn't get any better, it DID! Tina's return is fab -- Andrea Evans is sinking her teeth into this in a way her last role as Rebecca in PASSIONS didn't allow her to. Plus, I loved her way adorable dog, amusingly named DavidVickers! Susan Haskell's return as Marty was also welcome; Susan would have been my pick to replace Martha Byrne as Lily in ATWT but I'd rather see her return as Marty. And if all this wasn't exciting enough, thugs burst into Ramsey's apartment and killed him! (And his doorman! Poor Francisco!) Well, if Susan Haskell isn't replacing Martha Byrne on ATWT, what do you want to bet Hunt Block will reprise his recast role as Craig Montgomery on ATWT? I love the hell out of Scott Bryce, but if they're going to bring back Craig as someone else, Hunt Block is the only choice.

Speaking of good actors, let's have a moment to praise Bradford Anderson. I am a huge Spinelli fan but the character would not work as well if played by a lesser actor. Notice the end of today's GENERAL HOSPITAL, when Spinelli is dressed to impress and going by his first name of Damian (along with hilariously dodgy Jax-esque accent.) Giselle just swooned, and so did I! Or cast your mind back to the end of NIGHT SHIFT's first season, when Spinelli expressed a genuine sense of shock that Jolene threw herself in front of a bullet meant for him. Bradford Anderson should really have the Emmy nomination that Y&R's Bryton McClure inexplicably acquired. Let's hope for a fairer Emmy ballot in 2009.